okay im seriously sick of this stupid back and forth. if i coulde ven call it that.. i am currently writing this at 12:45 AM on a sunday night. or i guess a monday morning. whateve ri dont care..., im so exhsusted

bevs bullshit has been keeping me up NONSTOPP for a couple weeks straight now. ive been lateto school almost dailty. my grades sucks but thats not too different feom the norm tbh. they just suck more. but WHATEVR!! that usnt the point.

i ffeel like im losing it cus i have literally SEEEN bev in the fucking halls st dchool. her mom id sending her to school still. she's judt avoiding me. like,, youre telling me we have 3 CLASSES almost BACK TO BACK with each other snd i'm just missing her every time.???? dude i literally sit BEHINDD her in one. yeah theres no other explanation but the fucking coldest shoulder known to man i swesr,

im not evencsure if im genuinely worried or just frustrated at this point. i think its both. i just wanna talk to her,, to try to explain myself and apologize.. like can i NOT apologize??

does that sound obsessive

am i obsessed

sshes the only real friend ive ever had i dont want to lose her

id have to look for her during 2nd period. she cant jbe going that far off campus.i hope she knows that i csre for her so soo much snd this game shes playing is hurting the both of us.. i WILL find her tomorrow.

or today. whatever. fuck.

im going sleep